Stories
Stories are the most magical way of recounting history, morals, cultural traditions, and navigating relationships. And as Valentine’s day approaches, many are looking to romantic tales of love and happiness.
Disney monopolized the Grimm stories for several years, turning gruesome endings into happy endings and letting at least two generations get sucked into shallow concepts of “true love” and “prince charming” and finding “the happily ever after”. Disney stories and chick flicks have dominated a lot of the romantic notions fostered within society, but do not necessarily fit within the framework of real life.
There are, however, other stories out there of love and loss that reflect the emotions we go through in the real world. Few stories stand out and even fewer make it into the mainstream. There is one in particular, a hindi movie, that made an impression on me when I was a little girl, which is the story of a girl named Henna.
The Story of Henna (Hindi Movie, 1991)
Henna lives in the Pakistan side of Kashmir, a zealous young woman in love with life. One day, she finds a man washed up on the river bank with severe head trauma. She brings him to her village and nurses him to health, he recovers, and it appears he has lost his memory. She spends time with him and falls in love with him. She decides he is the one she wants to marry. He, too, wants to marry her until one day when his memory returns. He remembers that he is in love with another young woman with whom he was to be engaged the night he met with an accident. The young woman, waiting for him, is in India. At the height of the India-Pakistan conflict, Henna decides to help her love cross the border and back to his love. It was a dangerous mission, one which involved being targeted by the militia. While the young man crossed the border with not more than a scratch, young Henna took a bullet and died in the process – a display of her unconditional love.
Unconditional Love
In today’s society, I believe we have forgotten to love with the passion and unconditionality with which Henna does. No, maybe not forgotten, maybe afraid to let ourselves get hurt deeply the way Henna does, both physically and emotionally. But Henna did not love to receive love, she loved because she loved herself and had a lot of love still to share and give. My argument, then, is that intense love does not, and can not, exist without the potential for intense pain. And if we yearn for love, we must be willing to let down our walls and be open to the pain that comes with its loss. And most importantly, to learn to love ourselves.
Dreams and Illusions 